Martin Fitzgerald offers up his player ratings after Liverpool beat Sheffield United 2-1 in the Premier League at Anfield BIG win that, Reds. Massive. That loon they’ve got locked in solitary confinement in Stockley Park tried to fuck us again but the boys...
THE cafes there must have been gutted there were no away fans. I haven’t seen this many wasted brownies since the Wavertree Girl Guides got into balloons. Anyway, here’s your match ratings… The Growing Pains of Adrian in Goal: 6 Does the occasional thing you...
FUCKING hell, Reds. That fella in Stockley Park must have been on the biftas and playing Crash Bandicoot all game. Probably popped to the garage for a Ginsters when Henderson scored and asked the fella behind the counter what he thought. Honestly, I can’t work it out....
THE thing about retaining the league is it’s a bit like winning a pie-eating competition, only to be told the prize is more pies. And let’s be honest, we ate a shit load of pies last season, way more than we needed to. The Spanish Pie Head in second place just kept...
SEE Arsenal brought back that weird Doom Metal font? I’m not saying that Arteta and his big lego head read my match ratings on Monday but someone’s tipped him off. Fucking snide that. I might have to start putting these behind a paywall. Or stop talking about fonts...
