// THE MATCH RATINGS
Ben Johnson’s alternative approach to post-match Liverpool player ratings…
Liverpool 4 Southampton 0: The Match Ratings
HONEST to God, the only thing that can stop The Reds now is the fucking Corona. Fucking not having it that Ferguson isn’t behind it. In the deepest fucking Wuhan forests there he is like Attenborough in Jurassic Park, splicing fucking squid blood and chicken balls...
West Ham United 0 Liverpool 2: The Match Ratings
SAY what you want about Moyes, but he can’t half fill space. Fills it like a fucking boss. You should see his garage. Jam packed with all kinds. Two or three lawnmowers in there, no bother. All hung up. Plastic storage boxes full of books. Loads of golf clubs. Tools....
Shrewsbury Town 2 Liverpool 2: The Match Ratings
I’M on the ratings this week as Ben Johnson is on his anniversary stag doo. Let’s dissect that for a minute. He enjoyed his stag doo so much he does it every year. It’s a magnificent blag, that. Best blag since Hodgson convinced the world he was a good manager. What a...
Wolves 1 Liverpool 2: The Match Ratings
WHAT a team. Honestly, we are witnessing greatness. The mind being the greatest of all. Never beaten these fuckers, never willing to lie down, never willing to cede any ground whatsoever. You want to beat these, mate? You better take your best shot and hope it fucking...
Liverpool 2 Manchester United 0: The Match Ratings
I MEAN, I don’t know, I guess that goes up there with the best ever way to win any fucking game especially against them fuckers. The first 60 minutes was the most one-sided game against these I have seen. I like to think Baxter Dury had this first half/the current...
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// THE MATCH RATINGS
Ben Johnson’s alternative approach to post-match Liverpool player ratings…
Liverpool 4 Southampton 0: The Match Ratings
HONEST to God, the only thing that can stop The Reds now is the fucking Corona. Fucking not having it that Ferguson isn’t behind it. In the deepest fucking Wuhan forests there he is like Attenborough in Jurassic Park, splicing fucking squid blood and chicken balls...
West Ham United 0 Liverpool 2: The Match Ratings
SAY what you want about Moyes, but he can’t half fill space. Fills it like a fucking boss. You should see his garage. Jam packed with all kinds. Two or three lawnmowers in there, no bother. All hung up. Plastic storage boxes full of books. Loads of golf clubs. Tools....
Shrewsbury Town 2 Liverpool 2: The Match Ratings
I’M on the ratings this week as Ben Johnson is on his anniversary stag doo. Let’s dissect that for a minute. He enjoyed his stag doo so much he does it every year. It’s a magnificent blag, that. Best blag since Hodgson convinced the world he was a good manager. What a...
Wolves 1 Liverpool 2: The Match Ratings
WHAT a team. Honestly, we are witnessing greatness. The mind being the greatest of all. Never beaten these fuckers, never willing to lie down, never willing to cede any ground whatsoever. You want to beat these, mate? You better take your best shot and hope it fucking...
Liverpool 2 Manchester United 0: The Match Ratings
I MEAN, I don’t know, I guess that goes up there with the best ever way to win any fucking game especially against them fuckers. The first 60 minutes was the most one-sided game against these I have seen. I like to think Baxter Dury had this first half/the current...