I’M not sure if you are aware, but someone writing for The Anfield Wrap last week apparently referred to the current England manager as the Devil. I know, it’s outrageous isn’t it? Whoever it was should be ashamed of themselves. I’m fairly sure they will have been sternly and suitably reprimanded for this awful misrepresentation but this writer can only apologise on their behalf for the shame that this alleged association brought on to the individual and the hurt they must have felt to be compared to such an abhorrent figure (That should be enough to get the Devil’s brief off our case for a bit Robbo, what do you reckon?).
Before all you Cockneys dress up as St George and come to try and slay us all please note that I am only messing. Also bear that in mind when you read this next bit, as it might seem that I am purposefully trying to wind you up. I know you love him and that and he is one of your own but what the frigging hell is going on with Harry Kane?
I mean, he bangs them in but have you seen him? Never has a face looked so out of context on the football pitch. It is like his head has walked through the Goodnight Sweetheart time-lapse alleyway and appeared on the pitch attached to the body of Alan Shearer, scoring goals in spite of himself, with his head playing a constant game of catch up to the events and the body surrounding him.
If that wasn’t bad enough then you hear him speak and he sounds like he is talking through his 1940s’ mouth while harbouring three pickled eggs in his cheeks like some kind of giant Cockney bird. Perhaps the ready availability of protein is the reason why he is so good.
His goal on Saturday was absolutely brilliant mind — the first touch was as good as you will see, opening up the angle and completely wrong-footing Dejan Lovren in one move, allowing him the slightest chance to score.
Kloppo talked about us switching off the machine for a minute in the run up to the goal but I think sometimes credit has to go to the fella who has just made something pretty much out of nothing.
Yes, Lovren is slightly too close to Kane but, in fairness, I don’t think he can reasonably be blamed for the goal due to the quality of what Kane does. Either way, it was really hard lines for The Lov as he was excellent from start to finish.
If we switched off the machine in the seconds leading up to their goal then Christ knows what Mamadou Sakho was doing to it in the first half.
My guess is purposefully trying to dismantle it into its component parts while it was going full pelt — the equivalent of putting your hand inside the washing machine while it is on spin cycle and trying to pull out the drum.
It wasn’t the first time that Kloppo has commented on the others team’s best chances coming from our lads passing to them and you get the feeling that he is getting a little bit fed up with it now.
I like Sakho a lot but he does have an Igor wacky 10 minutes in him every now and again and you can understand the manager getting pissed off with it. What is the point of trying to pressurise a team all over the park and prevent them from having a minute’s peace or a shot on target and then gift-wrapping them the ball in the final third with all our lads up the pitch?
You want reliability out of your centre halves not someone who is going to be man of the match one week and then crackers the week after. Lovren has started to show this over the last few months and Sakho will have to do the same if he is going to convince the manager that he should remain in his plans.
There has been a fair bit of criticism of Dan Sturridge’s performance with questions around work-rate and attitude, his supposed inferiority to Harry Kane and how he is well behind him in the England pecking order.
Firstly, on the England thing, that’s sound, let that ‘The Devil Wears Big Watches’ frigger test Harry Kane’s mettle and run him into the ground until he can’t walk for six months rather than super Dan. I don’t think his mettle has got another Hodgy hod-carrying special in it.
Secondly, he does brilliantly for our goal. His movement in between their lines is great and the timing and pace of the pass is perfect and almost makes Coutinho’s mind up for him.
Sturridge is also unlucky with the header in the second half and maybe snatches at the chance in the first half instead of having another touch and slotting it as per usual. Perhaps this is the first time in his Liverpool career where he is struggling for a bit of confidence and just needs a bit of support.
Calling him lazy seems, well, a bit lazy to be honest. Especially when it is whacked about by people who do well to get their socks on never mind dealing with the demands of playing up front for a Klopp team.
What do you want out of your centre forward? I want him to be a threat, for the opposition to worry about him and for him to score loads of goals. Not sure about you, but I would put my money on Dan Sturridge outscoring any of the other centre forwards at the club.
I’d put my money on him creating more goals than any of the other forwards at the club, too. I’ll take that for now, I think. There is more value to it than having nothing but work-rate up front.
Divock Origi has potential coming out of his ears but he is nowhere near as dangerous a player. What do you prefer — guile and craftsmanship, or graft? If it’s the latter why don’t we just sign Lee Cattermole and lash him up front? Or maybe get Momo back?
Luis Suarez aside, I’m not sure you get both in the same player and, in fairness to him, I think Sturridge is trying to do what Klopp demands but is still struggling to get back to full fitness after not playing since we all had hair and were two stone lighter.
Let’s give Sturridge a break and maybe some support. What about a new song? Why did Danny Murphy get that “Super Danny Murphy” song when he was:
a) Not super
b) A bit of a massive wool
c) Dead slow
d) Probably average?
Why can’t Sturridge have it? It isn’t the best, but people seemed to like to sing it and we all know that is what is important with the Anfield songbook — the subject doesn’t tend to matter.
After all, John Arne Riise got his song sung every week and he was so shite that me and Neil went on the ale when he was sold (the old Korova, had a good night if truth be told, we hugged on arrival). It was a genuine case of “town” when the news broke.
Either way, and this could be out of line, but singing a song about our most prolific player might encourage him a bit more than calling him “a lazy twat”. It might be worth a go. If it doesn’t work you get to call me a gobshite and then get to crack on with the lazy bastard shouts like it’s Easter Sunday and you gave it up for Lent.
The performance and result on Saturday felt like further confirmation, if any was needed, of the progress made to date under Kloppo and how much more there is to come.
I don’t think it is too much of a leap of faith to think that we might challenge next year given the improvements made already and the potential that is evident in the majority of performances.
Tottenham are a good team and we more than matched them. I’ll take that for now.
Dortmund on Thursday night will bring another chance to prove what we are all about. They are another good team that might have too much for these Reds or might not. What I’m looking forward to is to witness the love they have for Klopp and to think that we might love him that much in the future.
What are we going to be like when the machine doesn’t knock off or stop working and we haven’t got any lads trying to willingly or unwillingly sabotage it? Craig Johnston rapped about this years ago: “No-one knows quite what to expect, when the Red Machine is in full effect”.
I don’t know either, Craig, but I can imagine — and I’m fairly sure — it is going to be glorious.
Up the Mighty Reds.
Nah, I think supporters are more annoyed with the fact(s) that:
He is pretty average at times (no excuses);
He doesnt make the easy pass (we should have scored) on many occasions; and
He needs to accept when hes being subbed – a grimace and a nod aint gonna change the managers’s decision – its a team game.
When Studge can get his head around these three simple facts, supporters will give him a standing ovation: when he scores and when hes subbed.
You really want the lad to be buzzing he’s getting subbed at 1-1 on 65. Who the fuck wants that striker.
To your “fact(s)”: –
1. Very few players are exceptional at ALL times – most, even those that dislike him, tend to think he’s something better than average.
2. Maybe he’s struggling for form/confidence and wants to do it by himself – score the goal, make the difference, be the ‘Old Sturridge’.
3. See above, its hard to prove to those who call him average that he’s actually better than that when he’s sat on the bench. More ‘team player’ blokes have thrown bigger strops than Sturridge when subbed. As Klopp suggested, I’d have more issue if he celebrated being subbed off.
I think Ben has it spot on with his thoughts on the matter – try supporting him! He’s the best striker we’ve got, have had and will probably have for a good while. Suarez aside, we’ve had no-one as good as Sturridge since Torres’ body betrayed him and unless you can picture Klopp strong-arming Lewandowski to the club then that isn’t going to change any time soon.
Nothing makes me more upset than idiots online responding to an author of an article or blog post with “nah.” It’s baby back bullshit that someone would have the gall to simply dismiss someone’s work, which is provided for FREE, with a “nah,” then go on to make some bogus point that doesn’t address anything in the piece.
And I know that I’m also an idiot for taking the time to address this. And I know that I’m an idiot for thinking that this is important enough to comment on, but society’s modern use of “nah” drives me bananas. It’s disrespectful. Please stop.
Also, Daniel Sturridge is going to grimace because he wants to fucking score and he wants to fucking win.
Love the lad and agree with everything, but you can see he isn’t himself yet. The second I finally see him break into a full on sprint i’m going town.
Riise was shite? Bet you were back on the ale after watching Dossena his replacement ! Sturridge is being baby sat by Klopp, says it nothing to do with his fitness but he’s slowly bringing him back up to speed!
I just don’t get this Sturridge shit. He’s fucking top-quality and is trying to get his match sharpness back after TWO years out, FFS. Give the lad a break. Since he came back into the team, the opposition have started to worry about who is up front for us and that creates space for all our other boss lads. He’s clinical. He scares. He’s quick. He creates. But he deffo needs a song!
Spot on article, Ben. I think Dortmund will be tricky to get through, but I reckon we’ll do better than Spurs did.
Up the Reds!!!!
Dan Dan……….Dan Dan…..Dan Dan….Dan Dan..Dan Dan Jaws
One can make excuses for Sturridge until they are piled as high an an elephants eye but what cannot be denied is that the front line looks better with Firmino as the 9.5 rather than with a traditional No 10 even when its someone who does have the ability to create a chance to score in a flash. I feel Klopp has more than goals in mind as he looks as his options for next season and right now Sturridge has the look of a man still not willing to put his hamstrings and muscles on the line. That’s a situation that cannot go on forever and he is running out of games this season to make himself a nailed on starter next season.
Should Gotze (or similar) be purchased in the summer then I’d have to wonder about his chances at LFC even if assuming Benteke is a goner.
When it isn’t happening for Dan then Dan doesn’t want to know
Talking of songs we like singing:
Oh Daniel Sturridge
Too good for the bridge
Too good for city
Cos hes a red
He takes his chances
And then he dances
Oh please dont take our Sturridge away
Feels like someone gets it mate. I thought I posted my own little bit or neurosis in the wrong place but I’ll let you speak for me.
Elegant my friend, well played.
Also my bit is about Coutinho and Gerrard rather than Sturridge so I appreciate the helping hand.
Agree with everything you say but what the fark is all this ‘Kloppo’ Rollix mate, that’s pure wool that is! Leave it out!
The amount of undeserved shit Sturridge cops is really starting to annoy me
He is clearly playing within himself coz he just wanna stay on the pitch rather than getting injured, we still look our most threatening when he plays (Origi for all his potential hard running and undoubted talent still doesn’t give us the goal threat Sturridge does). It’ll take time for him to get back into it, before then people just needs to stop putting pressure on the lad when he is already pressuring himself too much already
Some of my the stuff I heard in the lower centenary on Saturday was unbelievable, but not just for studge. I think there’s s big problem at the ground for support in general.
A lovely woman on the 2nd row was screaming C*NT at him for walking off slowly. And I mean screaming. This went on all game.
I have to say, sorry but it’s usually locals too I’ve found. I don’t know why they go.
I agree with you, give the lad a chance he looks very nervous about getting another injury. See how he gets on at the euros (fingers crossed) he will probably change a few minds and turn a few heads.
He can’t win, when he was out injured some moaned & wanted him sold. Now he’s back it seems the same people are moaning again & want him sold again.
There’s a group of mates behind me in the Kop who constantly call him lazy, even in 13/14 season. He scores v Southampton, & got an assist v Tottenham after basically being out for over a year bar a few short lived returns. Give him a break.
When we find someone else who could score a goal like that one against Southampton we can slate Sturridge. Big fan of Origi, mind.
Play both together?
Get in Ben;
“Calling him lazy seems, well, a bit lazy to be honest. Especially when it is whacked about by people who do well to get their socks on never mind dealing with the demands of playing up front for a Klopp team.”
well f**kin’ said mate. Sick of this, same twerps who either constantly whine about the past or will berate the next striker for not being as good as Studge. He needs help (and another striker would go a long way huh?) not shitty comments from the stands.
BlueNose behavior that.
He is a SuperStar and better treat him like a Legend.
Sat in the main stand for the first time in about 8 years. I’m a London born red witb a strong Scouse connection rhiugh my mums side all scouser a all reds (except one toffe)
I have never felt so disappointed with my fans , nothing but moaning and complaining and sturidge gets the worse of it.
I’m sorry but it needs to said and addressed but weather it’s true or not many young black fans and many young black footballers and I know some personally , believe that fans don’t like sturidge because of his colour, as a 35 year old black man I have been told and except that I have to work twice as hard as my white counterparts to get on or to get praise, sturidge will have heard this but his age group is less likely to except this .
Sturidge came with the tag of a player with a poor attitude ( a lable attached to many black or foreign players ) which was based on nothing but rumour, he then made an extra effort to show he is down to earth and fun , but got accused of not taking the game seriously !!
Then he kept himself to himself more and now he is accused of not wanting to be at the club.
Would those sort of accusations have been laid at his feet if he looks different ? He is an intelligent boy and believe me he would have noticed and people around him also
I know for a fact it influenced sterling. I’d love it if the andield wrap could cover this and discuss it because it needs to be talked about . Even if it’s complete rubbish believe me many black fans of Liverpool in and out of the city believe his to some extent which means it needs to be addressed .
Don’t agree to be honest mate. It’s just the way it is now, fans get on all players backs constantly. The amount of shit players like Hendo deal with is ridiculous. Don’t think it’s a race thing just a fans not liking footballers thing.
Bullshit of the highest order, people were getting on his back for traipsing off the pitch at half speed when there was a game still to be won – not because of his colour. If his race was an issue you’d have known about it long before now!
‘You want reliability out of your centre halves not someone who is going to be man of the match one week and then crackers the week after.’
I’ve been thinking this since Southampton. After the game at Old Trafford I’d felt as though I’d seen the best performance from a Liverpool centre half pair since about 2009 and then fast forward a few days and one’s been hooked at half time and the other is nowhere near tight enough on any of their goals. It’s not good enough.
If this Matip is more of the same and we don’t sign a good goalie we’ll finish mid table next season as well.
Ha, spot on article. Watching the match my mate asked me, ‘What is it I don’t like about Harry Kane?’ I told him it’s because he’s from WW II. As for Studge, getting subbed when we’re about to take a corner is going to piss off any striker. Mind you, with our corners Klopp was probably just trying to save him the 80 yard chase-back.
He’s our best player, he nearly always delivers (he has Liverpool’s best ever goals per games ratio) and is coming back from 2 years of injury hell. Give him some love, for ffs.
I don’t get the Anfield crowd on this one. Studge when firing, when pumped, when loved, is the most potent player we and England have. Kane is class, no doubt, but in terms of natural ability, sharp mind and quicker feet, Dan is THE man, end of. Why does he not have a song pumped out every week? What more does he have to do? His goals per game are up there with all our legends. This guys deserves and needs some love. Sort it out!!!
I believe Sturridge will soon be back to his previous form. He is just an example of someone with a divided mind. He wishes to play regularly with full 90 minutes under his belt but also thinking about staying fit for d Euros. He doesn’t need criticism as he is jst coming back to playing regularly after being out for a long time, a bit of more support from the fans may jst do d magic. Watch out for him on Thursday as he is jst gonna blow ur mind off. YNWA!
Great article… I don’t get the negativity around Sturridge, his record when fit is fantastic and he does deserve a song or at least his name chanted as singing for Origi when Danny does off is just insulting and actually down right embarrassing, I don’t mind the lazy accusations from people online as they just haven’t a clue as if he was lazy, he wouldn’t have been in the positions he was to score and set up the goal but more than that the guy is getting back to fitness and clearly is stifling a bit for top gear, I just think we need to get behind him and see how it goes…