John Gibbons’ player ratings after Preston North End 0 Liverpool 2 in the fourth round of the League Cup at Deepdale Stadium…


Adrian: 8

Made one good save first half — you know the one, the first one, when he sort of palmed it out — and then made a great save a few minutes later when Gomez went berserk and left Matip four against one. Did well throughout, really.

Neco Williams: 7

He never really does much wrong but he doesn’t half do my head in when he gets it on the edge of their box. He’s weirdly tricky in a dead none tricky way. Like Paul Daniels. I’m going to pull a rabbit out of this hat. Sound Paul. Great. I’m just going to pop it into this hat first. Give me a minute. Da daaa. Yer was sound that mate.

Think he cleared one off the line with his face which is sound really when you think about it. He is a proper full back in the Steve Finnan traditional meaning of the position. It’s just a little bit unfortunate that he plays for a side that sets up with playmakers and wingers as full backs. He is sound, all told.

Felt a bit like a Rafa diddle lashing him right wing. Bluenose cunt. Hahaha, well in Rafa. Went on one of his dead obvious mazy runs for the goal where he looks like he is giving it away all day and then put it on a plate for Taki instead. One on one at the end there and fancied it himself when he could have squared it for three.

Gomez: 6

Was a bit mad first half. Got outpaced by a big fucking danish Viking fella for the one on one, might have been Thor or one of the other big slow fuckers, handy with a hammer shouldn’t be legging you. Probably should have treated the ball like a chisel and twatted it. Then tried to dribble past one fella on the edge of his box, gave it away, left Matip about six on one and needed Adrian to pull him out the shit.

Now, I don’t know, I might be being a bit harsh here, but if I fell into a massive vat of shit — I’m not sure of the circumstances of how that would come to pass, by the way, presumably on a farm — I wouldn’t be choosing Adrian to pull me out. Doesn’t look like he has got the strength in his arms. Too busy fucking about with that big yellow towel. Would drown in shite. What a way to go.

Better second half.

Matip: 6

Looked like he couldn’t be arsed playing next to Gomez because of his carry-on first half. Got off at half time, didn’t tell anyone. Probably just got changed and had a scran. Lashed his jeans on.

Tsimikas: 6

Was OK. Not good. Not bad.

Morton: 7

Tidied up well a few times first half and was unlucky with a few balls into the half space. Neat and tidy player, like him a lot.

Chamberlain: 7

Probably the one player first half who tried to play and looked the most likely to do something. Wasn’t much competition, like. Played well second half, aside from when he twatted that one out when Tsimikas was overlapping.

Jones: 6

Couldn’t really get going tonight. Played better second half like most of The Reds, to be fair.

Divock: 7

No space so he drifted about like a car in neutral. Then stood still in the box like a cat at the bottom of a hill and then reverse fly kick back heeled one in somehow. Fucking silly fella him. Buzzed off himself for ages after it as well, which was sound.

Minamino: 6

Christ. Would like him to do more. Much fucking more. As in something. Struggled like fuck first half. To be fair there wasn’t much room between the lines, but when he did get it he gave it away pretty much every time. Should have done better with the half chance just after half time. Great run and finish for the goal.

Blair: 6

Honestly genuinely never ever heard his name before in my life. That says more about me than it does him, but even still. Tried his best but couldn’t quite get in it. To be fair, The Reds were shite while he was on the pitch


Phillips: 6

Come on and headed it.

Bradley: 6

Unleashed the beast that is right wing Neco, so extra two points. Great run into their box. Looks good.

Brought some more lads on in the last few minutes. Partridge shrug.

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