YOU’VE already had Messrs Coppack, Sutton, Fitzsimmons and Graves. Now we have Martin Fitzgerald, Andi Thomas, Jim Boardman and Phil Blundell’s predictions about what’s to come for Liverpool and other matters arising…

 

Martin Fitzgerald

 

What do Liverpool still need to do before the window closes?

Sell the surplus centre backs (Skrtel and Coates) and replace them with one first team ready centre back.

Sign a back up keeper to Mignolet. Needs to be able to combine the ability to sit on the bench for most of the season whilst also being “good” if called upon. Someone either at the start or end of their career.

One “Marquee” signing to sell shirts innit.

 

Which Liverpool player are you most looking forward to watching?

Daniel Sturridge. As a fan base we need to get behind him more. Whenever we do praise him it’s always riddled with caveats – his attitude (whatever that means), his dance or his “work ethic”

Whilst Newcastle and Fulham away were great days out I couldn’t help wonder what Sturridge thought of the away support. An away support that were signing songs about Suarez (not on the pitch due to a self inflicted suspension) whilst ignoring Sturridge who scored 5 goals in those two games.

His hat trick against Fulham was as impressive as it gets.

Daniel, if you’re reading this, I’ve got your back.

 

What amusement arcade game do you excel at?

I’m in no way a violent person so it’s always a surprise to me how good I am at the “punch the punchbag and make the bell ring” game. I’ll take on all comers at that.

 

How many points and what position do you think Liverpool will finish with?

72 points, 5th place

 

Whose back are you getting on early?

Daniel Agger.

I think he gets an easy ride off the fans because he’s got the right tattoo. The first time he loses his man at a set piece this season I’ll be like “Could have had 20 million for him. Again.”

Daniel, if you’re reading this, er, sorry mate. Great tat though.

 

What are your drinking plans before the first game of the season?

Usual routine – Meet Rob Gutmann in the Paisley Lounge about 90 minutes before kick off. Spend 89 minutes talking about summer holidays, the JFK assassination, Rob’s new bar and in the final minute one of us will say “what do you reckon about the football then?”

Football fans don’t always talk about football.

 

Who do you think will win the league?

I think managers win leagues so it’s hard not to look past Chelsea.

 

Who do you think will go down?

Crystal Palace, Hull City and Sunderland

 

Who is your favourite player Martin O’Neill has ever managed?

Henrik Larsson

 

Make three predictions across the league season

1) Away fans traveling to Selhurst Park will be late

2) Home fans traveling to Selhurst Park will be late

3) Jonjo Shelvey will occasionally give the sort of performance for Swansea that will make some Liverpool fans regret selling him

 

What are you least looking forward to this season?

Fan A describing Fan B as “not a proper fan” because Fan A’s ego is so large that HE refuses to believe that are alternative approaches to fandom.

And yes, Fan A is typically a HE.

 

You are DJing to a wedding crowd. The couple are 28. What song are you dropping at around 11pm to make it go right off?

28??? What’s wrong with them?

Too Much Too Young by The Specials

 

What are you most looking forward to this season?

There has never been a season with so much schadenfreude potential as this one – Hodgeball not being good enough for the World Cup, Moyes not being good enough for Man Utd, Martinez not being good enough for Everton.

All that aside though, I’m looking forward to the usual – through balls that no one else in the ground can see, last minute winners, hugging strangers, the comedic misery of our coach driver, that slow version of YNWA we sometimes do and, last but no means least, looking smugly at the thousand yard stare of away fans at Selhurst Park because I stayed the night with a mate who lives 5 minutes from the ground.

 

Andi Thomas

 

What do Liverpool still need to do before the window closes?

Stop Daniel Agger falling out of it.

 

Which Liverpool player are you most looking forward to watching?

As much as I possibly can, which isn’t really very much at all, and as much as I remain to be entirely convinced that he’s quite the divine presence that a lot of people seem to think he is, or at least seem to really, really want him to be, Philippe Coutinho.

 

What amusement arcade game do you excel at?

I am unstoppable at those ones where you put the 2p in, it falls in front of a moving shelf, and then knocks the other 2ps down. Well, perhaps not unstoppable. Acceptable, maybe. Do they even have a name?

 

How many points and what position do you think Liverpool will finish with?

Sixth, 60-something. Let’s say … 65. A small improvement.

 

Whose back are you getting on early?

Well, Luis Suarez’s. Obviously.

 

What are your drinking plans before the first game of the season?

Several pints of Lighthouse while watching the cricket. Though that’s not a plan, really, so much as a “what I did last weekend”. Dulwich Hamlet won 2-0, since you ask.

 

Who do you think will win the league?

Jose Mourinho and Juan Mata.

 

Who do you think will go down?

Hull, Crystal Palace, and the Mark Hughes Stoke Experience.

 

Who is your favourite player Martin O’Neill has ever managed?

Muzzy Izzet. A four-Z player.

 

Make three predictions across the league season.

Cardiff City will be decent, Theo Walcott will score a surprisingly large number of goals without ever managing to look like a proper footballer, and Fulham — with Berbatov, Ruiz, *and* Taarabt — will be a depraved feast.

 

What are you least looking forward to this season?

The Mark Hughes Stoke Experience.

 

You are DJing to a wedding crowd. The couple are 28. What song are you dropping at around 11pm to make it go right off?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_SOFUbQkxnY

 

What are you most looking forward to this season?

Shinji Kagawa. The new Leon Osman.

 

Jim Boardman

 

What do Liverpool still need to do before the window closes?

Sort the defence out. What’s happening at full back? What’s happening at centre back? Enrique is too inconsistent for us to use him every game and it wouldn’t do Glen Johnson any harm to feel he had some genuine competition on his side of the pitch. If Skrtel doesn’t leave it’ll be a surprise – if he stays and plays it’ll be even more of a surprise. We need a replacement now – and Toure isn’t it. Toure is great to have in the squad but I didn’t expect him to be playing every game, he’s there as cover, cover we need because Agger isn’t exactly nailed on to be fit for every game. So, top quality centre-back, top quality full-back are priorities.

Of course we all love a good new exciting attacking signing and that TV money could do with being spent, if it’s there, but not just spent for the sake of it. The club cheque book needs an Andy Carroll sticker slapping on the front as a reminder.

 

Which Liverpool player are you most looking forward to watching?

Phil. I hope we can all wind that in a bit though because we’ll end up putting him off. The first time the ball went to him in Dublin I’m sure 40,000 people gasped in anticipation. Ration the gasps.

 

What amusement arcade game do you excel at?

Arkanoid.

 

How many points and what position do you think Liverpool will finish with?

75 points and third. Yes, third.

 

Whose back are you getting on early?

I don’t want to get on anyone’s back but I’ve a feeling Enrique might get it, I lacked patience with him in Dublin. I’d rather think of who I’ll blindly get behind regardless of performance this season – I’ve picked Joe Allen.

 

What are your drinking plans before the first game of the season?

I’m usually driving and I’ve not even sorted a ticket yet so it’ll probably be a coffee from Homebaked. Everyone should do that anyway: before, after or instead of the pub.

 

Who do you think will win the league?

Manchester City. Their new manager will adapt to his new club better than their neighbours’ manager adapts to his new club.

 

Who do you think will go down?

Hull will struggle most of the three who have just come up, Stoke will struggle too because they’re going to try changing their playing style without changing enough players. I’ll add Fulham to that too because they’ve changed owners and will inevitably upset the spirit of Michael Jackson.

 

Who is your favourite player Martin O’Neill has ever managed?

Emile Heskey. Don’t need a reason.

 

Make three predictions across the league season.

Goal-line technology won’t actually be needed once all season. Sam Allardyce will be spending his weekends working as a pundit by December. David Moyes will ban more journalists than his predecessor.

 

What are you least looking forward to this season?

 The nonsense that surrounds everything involving the words or actions of Jose Mourinho.

 

You are DJing to a wedding crowd. The couple are 28. What song are you dropping at around 11pm to make it go right off?

The wedding is in Bolton so I play “The Way to Amarillo” and leg it, vowing never to go there again.

Otherwise “Billie Jean” by Michael Jackson. But not in Fulham.

 

What are you most looking forward to this season?

Some good football from Liverpool, fewer mistakes from Liverpool, more points for Liverpool, more fun for us watching. Loads of fun.

 

 

Phil Blundell

 

What do Liverpool still need to do before the window closes?

First team players  – a 15 goal man who can play off the left, a left back who’ll be first choice, and whilst we need a centre back I really think Toure will be a useful player until January, when we’ll bring that mad Greek from Schalke who’ll be fully recovered from this knee injury then.

 

Which Liverpool player are you most looking forward to watching?

Kolo Toure – I’m a big fan of mad fellas. And he’s pretty mad isn’t he? You can’t not be excited about someone who had an affair and told the bird he was having it off with that he was a Car Salesman.

 

What amusement arcade game do you excel at?

It’s been a while, but I went on some basketball game last week and I was decent at that, but excel probably isn’t the right word.

 

How many points and what position do you think Liverpool will finish with?

I think 4th is wide open this year. Arsenal haven’t strengthened, Spurs seem to be strong but lack any real creativity going forward and could lose Bale as well which clearly won’t help them. Arsenal will probably still scrape 4th, but I think we’ll go close with 70 points.

 

Whose back are you getting on early?

It might have  to be Gerrard if he continues with his leaving gaps in the midfield game that he enjoyed playing last season.

 

What are your drinking plans before the first game of the season?

It’s got car crash written all over it – work Summer party Friday night, then the 7am train Saturday morning. There’s a reasonable chance I’m not making that and my drinking plans will involve me crying in my bed with a bottle of water. If I make Liverpool I’ll hunt down my Stoke supporting uncle and then end up somewhere in town after the match – I heard there’s some new place opening so I might venture there. Anyone know what it’s called?

 

Who do you think will win the league?

City at a canter. Not enamoured by their signings this summer particularly but their squad is ridiculous. And their main competition, Chelsea, are still not going to have a midfield, which is what held them back so much last year. Ferguson was worth 10 points a season to United and Moyes won’t replicate it so they’ll not be an issue.

 

Who do you think will go down?

Crystal Palace could be miles away from everyone else, Norwich might have come 11th last year, but that’s the most false finish ever and I think they’ll go, and West Brom haven’t really done much in the way of replacing Lukaku and were on a downward curve of relegation level points per game from Xmas so could be a shock one.

 

Who is your favourite player Martin O’Neill has ever managed?

Andy Impey.

 

Make three predictions across the league season.

Paolo Di Canio to grab a player by the throat and throw him in the floor, Arsenal’s defensive unit to do something that makes you laugh around once a month, Roberto Martinez to begin the process of becoming my favourite manager of the Ev in history. The process ends with them in the Championship.

 

What are you least looking forward to this season?

I’m doing all 4 days at Cheltenham in March, and United away is pencilled in for the Saturday. I’m not looking forward to how I’ll feel that Sunday morning.

 

You are DJing to a wedding crowd. The couple are 28. What song are you dropping at around 11pm to make it go right off?

Chas and Dave – Rabbit. There’ll initially be loads of confusion, but then, it goes off. A load of bladdered people shouting ‘Rabbit’. How can this not be great?

 

What are you most looking forward to this season?

My birthday is sandwiched between the home Derby and West Brom Away. It is going to go right off in an alcohol and kebab related car crash of a week. You’re all invited.

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